Author Archive

I love Ted’s Draws

November 5, 2014

Outkast tshirt

What’s the best t-shirt label going right now? Ted’s Draws. Every single design they do is amazing – OutKast, Busta Rhymes, Janet Jackson, Sade.

I am not alone in liking them – everyone from Jourdan Dunn to Jessie Ware are fans. They’ve also collaborated with everyone from Palace to Le Coq Sportif to Virgin Records.

Everything they do is really limited so if you get the chance to buy a design you shouldn’t think twice.


I love instant coffee

April 14, 2008

I can’t believe there are people out there who turn their noses up at instant coffee. It’s so much more satisfying and less bitter than filter coffee and loads cheaper too. In fact, I find the cheaper the instant coffee, the better a lot of the time. I hate people who refuse to touch instant and look at you like you are a hideous, festering, rat piss-drinking pauper when you offer them some. These are the people who have a ridiculously expensive coffee machine at home, which they spend an hour every morning fiddling with and shovelling what looks like finely powdered faeces into until they end up with an egg cup full of something that tastes like soot. Caustic, gritty, inedible soot. I’m guessing people only make such a pitiful amount of the stuff because that is all they can stomach. In the past, I would naively and politely accept the offer of a cup of this black bile, but not any more. Now, whenever someone offers me some kind of fancy filter coffee, I smugly reply, “Sorry, dear, I only drink instant.”

I love mushrooms

March 10, 2008


No, silly, not those hallucinogens that university students experiment with after becoming bored with the inanity of smoking eighteen spliffs every day. I am talking about the mushrooms that you eat. There are so many different types to choose from and they’re all delicious. Button mushrooms, shiitake, oyster mushrooms. I don’t see why there isn’t a mushroom shop on every high street. I could easily imagine an independent chain called The Happy Mushroom. I mean, there are cheese shops everywhere and those places reek of putrefying dog sick.